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2003-06-05 21:59:54 ET Phoo...rough day... I had my first of two orientation classes today at GEBBCA. It went pretty well, although I think my teacher is going to be tough. This is good, though, as I know he won't send me to the state board test unless I am totally ready. I hope to be one of his best students, but I fear that I will only be average or a little below. Also, he said that the apprentice license takes about four to five months to process, and you can't start at the salon until you receive it...so I may be stuck at Starbucks longer than I'd like to be. Ugh...i hope that lady at Festoon calls me back soon...if I don't hear back a week and a half from now, I will march my happy ass in there and talk to SOMEONE. grrrrrr Then I got to work, and my supervisor had completely forgotten that I would be late. She had said before, when I told her about this, that she would clock me in at 2pm, and I wouldn't be late. She said it didn't matter as long as *she* knew about it. Well...she forgot...and even called my house wondering where I was. dammit. But it's ok...she left a note for the store manager telling her that I forgot to clock in... ...and I got yelled at for being *too* nice, and going the extra mile for a customer...phoo. anyhow...as far as the smoking thing, I am quitting tomorrow. I've only had six today...which is less than half of my normal amount. it gets harder towards the end of the day, when it's nearing time for my second dose of Zyban. My mom said that I could call her for support if I need it. Ugh...sooo hard...if there are any of you reading this who smoke once in a while, be careful, man...don't get addicted...in fact, stop now, because if you don't you'll have to go through this shit, and the longer you smoke, the harder it is. I couldn't imagine being a 30+ year smoker and quitting...I've only been smoking for 6-7 years, and this shit is FUCKING difficult. you keep coming up with excuses to smoke, like, "I'll quit tomorrow" "I'll cut back" "just once more...for old time's sake" "It's ok if I only do it once or twice a day" "It's ok to do it in large groups of smokers or when I'm drinking." The more you give into these excuses, the harder it will be to kick the habit. I haven't officially quit, yet and I've already made all of those excuses. But I know it's just my addiction talking. It will be hard, too, cuz Loki's quitting date isn't until next wed. But he will help me not to smoke, too...I can do it. It will just be difficult...I need to get some gum, hehe...gum helps a little. Ok...enough of this. Time for bed. Got another orentation class tomorrow. :] |
